Thursday 9 December 2021

Kakistocracy XXVI:We Like To Party.

"We like to party. We like, we like to party" - The Vengaboys

Far be it from me to question no lesser an authority than The Vengaboys but who doesn't like to party? I certainly do - even if I can't party as hard as I used to be able to. Even at my partying peak, though, I couldn't party as hard as the current UK government still do.

It's not so much the nature of the party, wine and nibbles, Secret Santa, fairly basic stuff, it's both the location (number 10 Downing Street) and, even more so, the timing of the party (at the start of a national lockdown when all social gatherings were expressly forbidden by law and on the day when over five hundred Covid deaths were registered) that showed that when it comes to partying nobody parties harder than Boris Johnson and the crooks and cronies that make up his administration.

I'd go so far as to say Boris Johnson would party on your grandmother's grave except, in many cases, that is already true. The Vengabus may drive around America and Europe kick starting the Vengaboys parties but the Brexit bus that Boris Johnson drives to announce the start of his parties is emblazoned with some of the his all time biggest lies.

Not all of them, of course. No bus has ever been built large enough to fit in all of Johnson's lies and no bus ever will. A sign of a good party is one people still talk about weeks after and even those of us who didn't attend this one, didn't even know it was happening, are still talking about it nearly a whole year later. That, folks, is one hell of a party.

Although, in fairness, we don't know if the party even happened. Many ministers and Johnson arselickers have stepped up to the plate to say that they have no idea if the party took place but if it did take place then definitely all the Covid guidelines were followed. Which, of course, is impossible.

There's no attempt at all to deny that Schrodinger's party took place. Simply minister after minister lining up to say they have no idea if it took place but that if it did then it wasn't against the law. Which it was - and should be investigated as such. Plenty of other people were fined for breaching lockdown rules so it's only fair that the people who make the laws should be bound by them.

Otherwise we no longer live in a democracy. We are on a fast track to a dictatorship. The only head that has rolled is that of Downing Street Press Secretary Allegra Stratton who was filmed tearfully resigning yesterday. It's her party and she can cry if she wants to (though sympathy for her is of course non-existent) but why was Stratton, along with the odious wanker Jacob Rees Mogg, filming a video a year ago denying, while laughing heartily, that a non-existent party took place?


While, at the same time, mocking the very idea of social distancing. People all around the country saw this video footage and their blood, correctly, boiled. This bunch of entitled cunts laughing as they break their own rules at the very same time we couldn't see, hold, or be with our families and closest friends.

It's right and proper that Stratton has resigned, she was always gonna be thrown under the Vengabus at the first sign of trouble anyway - that was pretty much her job, but why is Rees Mogg still in position and why is Johnson still the Prime Minister? He should go now before he damages our country any further and on leaving he should feel the full force of the law.

It's really something when even Ant & Dec start slagging him off at the start of I'm A Celebrity. Johnson's contempt for the British people was underlined when neither he nor any of his cabinet ministers deigned to appear on any news programmes to defend the indefensible the next morning. Adil Ray's words, on Good Morning Britain, about this dereliction of duty were absolutely chilling.


The contempt that Johnson holds the people of Britain in, those that voted for him as well as those that voted against him, has long been obvious. It is obvious in everything he says, everything he does, and every action he takes. Now, surely even the most blinkered of us must see this. If you were foolish enough to vote for him there is still time to repent.

Do it now. Do it for your country. Do it for your family. Do not let this evil man drag us further into deceit and division. We have seen with Brexit, with Covid, with the climate crisis, and with the migrant situation, as well as with many other things, that Johnson is simply unfit for office. Not just for the office of Prime Minister. But for any public office.

I genuinely thought I'd not be writing another one of these Kakistocracy blogs again for a few weeks (I try to keep sane as much as possible) and that when I did it would be about Johnson's backbenchers ranting about mask wearing being a socialist policy, about racist Tory peer Michelle Mone sending a WhatsApp message to a man of Indian heritage to call him a "waste of a white man's skin", and about Johnson's (and Macron's) muscle flexing in front of their bases in the UK and France regarding the migrant crisis.

About them not taking the deaths of human beings seriously and, in Johnson's case, undermining any chance of serious negotiation, by instead of talking to Macron, sending a Tweet into the public sphere (to which Macron, not unreasonably, called Johnson a clown). 

I thought I'd be writing about the new Vaccines Minister, Maggie Throup - MP for Erewash in Derbyshire, and her godawful performance on Question Time in which the audience laughed, jeered, and shook their head in disbelief as she lied, fell over her words, and tried to change the subject every single time she was asked a question.

It was abject. Throup is truly the perfect Johnson disciple. She is negligent, she is contemptuous, she is incompetent, she is self-serving, and she doesn't give a fuck about a single person except herself. She is an absolute fucking disgrace and Boris Johnson is an absolute fucking disgrace.

I normally finish these blogs with some personal stuff to lighten the mood but (a) I don't want to lighten the mood, there have been lots of very funny jokes made about Johnson and his contemptuous behaviour over the last few days but, underneath it all, there is a serious assault both on our democracy and our Covid response taking place and (b) I've not had a chance to do any cultural or social stuff since I last wrote.

I chatted on the phone to my parents and to Adam, I went for a walk, and I watched a bit of television. The cultural life of this country is now dominated by the ongoing shitshow of government corruption and will be for as long as Boris Johnson remains in power. I'll try to look forward to Christmas, of course, but there is just one present I want. I want, and I now believe the vast majority of the country want, Boris Johnson removed from the office. The criminal investigations can come later.




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